Coach Dad

My boys have never had the opportunity of being coached in any sport by their own dad. However, they have played on and against many teams where the coaches' son was on the team. Observing this I have seen many advantages and disadvantages. I have often wanted this for my boys, to have that quality time with their dad to bond through something they loved and also the extra one on one practice time outside of team practices. On the other hand, I have witnessed father and sons being pushed apart due to the amount of pressure put on the child by their dad, which has resulted in the child showing lack of effort or not wanting to play at all.
From my own experiences of watching youth sports and some research I have put together some pros and cons of dads coaching their own children.

Pros:

• Like I mentioned earlier, the time spent practicing and playing can be quality time for a dad and son to bond.
• A parent should have a better understanding of their own child's capabilities and disabilities both mentally and physically.
• With dad being coach the child may feel more comfortable talking to him if there is a problem.
• Being the father and coach you can be sure that the values, morals, and other life lessons that can be taught through playing sports are instilled in your child.

Cons:

• Often as parents and in this case parent/coaches we don't clearly see our own kids' down falls and tend to see them as being better or more capable then they actually are. This can cause a dad coach to make poor decisions as to what position their own child should play and how much playing time they should get; meaning the coaching son is often shown favoritism.
• Too much pressure and high expectations.
• It can be hard to separate a father/son relationship from coach/ son relationship resulting in problems at home.
• Critism from other player.
• Some kids may think that because their dad is the coach they don't have to work as hard or show respect to the coach or teammates.

Reguardless of who the coach is all players should be treated and taught fairly. Sports should be a fun and a great learning experience for all invloved!


Top 10 Youth Coaching Tips For Dads Coaching Youth Baseball, Football, and Basketball

Still At It!

                   It's been quite some time since I've posted and yes, I'm still at......running from field to field and gym to gym! In the last few years that I've been silent my boys have grown into awesome young teenagers, still ballin of course, and we've had lots of new and exciting experiences, ideas, challenges, and victories that I can't wait to share!
                    The boys are now 13 and 14, soon to be 15, and WOW raising two teenage boys as a single mom is whole story itself! They have since moved on from Little Leauge, Midget League, and Buddy leauge to High School and Middle School ball. Both having their pros and cons! All in all my "Team" and I have been pretty successful and keep pushing through to keep a good balance between work, school, family, sports, friends, and the many other things that come along in life!

Fundraiser Ideas

Every season to me and my "TEAM" means a different sport and a different fundraisers. Raising money is very important for a team or league. It help to provide them with equipment, uniforms, traveling, trophies, and we have even used left over money for a team party. Many times without the financial support of fundraisers there could be children who would not get the opportunity to participate in organized sports due to their financial situation.
I have put together a list to show and give ideas of what has worked for our teams in the past. Please, if you have other ideas you would like to add, leave them in a comment.

* Candy Bars - They are a great way to raise money. Everyone loves candy, they are inexpensive so you can sell in volume.
* Car window decals - This is the latest one that we did for my son's all-star team. We earned a little over $500.00. These really make great fundraisers, no money up front, $6 per sale profit, and each decal can be customized.
* Take Chances - Ask a local business to donate an item to raffle off. Give each team member 20 to 30 tickets. Depending on the value of what you are raffling you can sell the chances for $1, $2, or $5. Since there is no cost of the item to be raffled, you keep all the profit.
* Car Wash / Hot Dog Sale - This is so much fun for the kids and a big money maker. Ask the parents to donate the supplies and to supervise the kids at the car wash. Our local fire department lets us use their station.
* Equipment Sale - Last year before baseball season we sent out fliers to all the local schools asking parent to donate all of their kids old or unused baseball equipment: Cleats, bats, gloves, balls, etc. We had a huge sale and raised lots of money for the league and also the parents got some great bargains.
* Field Day - This year for football season we are planning a Field day for all children of all ages. We will set up stations with different activities: sit-ups, push-ups, throwing contest, most laps, etc. We will sell tickets to enter each contest for .25 and the winners will get a ribbon. We will also have concession and other booths.
If you have a great fundraiser you would like to share please leave a comment.
* FastTrack Fundraising - A huge variety of unique ideas and product. Just a few are: Popcorn, bracelets, lollipops, discount cards, magazines, cookies, candles, etc. This company will send you a FREE kit with all the info you need to get started! Just click here to check it out!

Kids On the Bench

Having two very athletic boys who love sports I have ran into a situation that I never had to deal with before. Both of my boys have always been very good at sports and been on the starting team, until this past year.
It started during baseball season which was my oldest sons first year of Little league. He sat the bench most of the season. It wasn't a huge deal because baseball is his least favorite sport and he enjoyed being in the dugout with his friends more then actually playing. Then basketball started and again he was on the starting team and made the all-star team. This is when the issue really began. He is no longer a starter and gets to play very little.
I have found myself on two sides of the fence. My youngest son always starts and rarely comes out of the game, then there is the other (the oldest) who sits the bench most of the time. Since I have never had to deal with this before I was clueless has to how to handle this situation. He is so hurt by not getting to play, and of course, it hurts me more. I did some research to find out how to help him and the effects this can have on a child.
My mission is to make sure that the benefits of him playing sports (or sitting the bench) out weigh what could be a negative outcome.

What I have found through my own observation and research is that organized sports has become more about the coaches and parents then about the kids. Winning is put before what the sport is really about. They forget that it is a game, a kids game, and a game is about playing. Children would rather loose a game and have fun playing rather then win and sit the bench. Coaches of youth sports should focus more on teaching kids the fundamentals, providing a positive experience, and enhancing there self esteem, for every player not just the best of the players.
Youth organized sports can be a very positive and fun experience however, in some situations it can also be very damaging to kids self esteem and mental well being. It wasn't until I started the research on this subject that I realized the impact it can have on kids.
When kids join an organized sports team they do so because they want to have fun and play. When they are not allowed to play and are always on the bench it can make them feel inadequate to the other kids, useless to the team, and lower their self esteem. This is why we have such a high percentage of kids quiting sports before the age of 12.
Many coaches will preach team work, no "I" in team. Yet they don't practice it by allowing each kids playing time. It is very hard as a parent to reinforce this when their child is being left out.
Tips for helping your bench warmer.
* Take their feelings into consideration and talk to them about it.
* Reassure them that you are proud of them for the time that they do get to play and for being a good sport.
* Encourage them to pay attention to the game, cheer their team on, and be ready to enter the game at all times.
* Offer them other alternatives to be active in other sports or groups.
* Most importantly, make sure you child want to be on the team.

Bad Refs, Bad Parents, Bad Coaches = Bad Messages

On an over night trip this weekend to watch my boys play basketball in an all-star tournament I witnesses the worst of the worst of referees. I have one son who plays on the 3rd grade team and one on the 5th grade team. The way the league is set up the play back to back starting with the 3rd grade and ending with the 6th grade. We almost always stay to watch and support the other teams.
During the 4th grade game I watched as they were robbed of the game by the refs. It was the worst I had ever witnessed. Play after play, call after call it was as if the refs were taunting the coach, the players, and the fans. Might I add, the atmosphere was quite intense.
As coaches, players, parents, and fans we expect the refs to have control over the games and to call the game honestly and professionally. When we feel that our team or children have been cheated by the refs making bad calls we tend to get a little  heated, understandably. However, I was a little shocked at the reactions of some of parents, coaches, and some of the players. I won't say that I have never shouted, "Bad call", "Come on ref", or our home town favorite, "Gotta love that home cookin". By the end of the game the parents were booing, the players were getting too rough, and the coach was getting technicals. The two teams and the coaches didn't even shake hands after the game.The end result, I think, was a huge lesson to the players and the lesson was: poor sportsmanship, win win win, and lack of respect.
This game inspired me to create this blog post to help parents, coaches, and refs be more aware of what our children may learn from what should be a positive influence.
I did some research to help provide parents, coaches, and officials with some information as to our responsibilities to make sure that our children are getting a positive out come from what we call a game, a kids game.

Duties and Responsibilities of Referees
As a game official, referees should show professionalism and take pride in there role as leaders. Providing a safe environment, encouraging and practicing fair play, and conducting a smooth operation of the game they can take care in earning respect from the team, coaches, fans, and all that they serve. With their skills and knowledge a good ref should be willing to be a leader and conduct things in a good manner that is fair and controlled.

How can refs live up to their obligations
* Take the time to make sure that the players, coaches, and the fans understand the rules and what is expected of them.
* Keep control of the game.
* Make Consistent and fair calls.
* Have a good attitude.
* Be a role model.
I believe that the refs hold the main key to a good and positive atmosphere for kids playing team sports.

How can coaches live up to their obligations
Coaches can be a huge, life time influence on kids. It is very important for coaches to be a role model and maintain a positive team environment. Coaches need to consider that kids look up to them and the influence that they have on them could stick with them and effect them through their years in sports.
* Ensure that the emotional and physical well being of each child is first priority.
* Treat each player as an individual according to their skills and personality.
* Be a positive role model.
* Practice and encourage fair play, team work, and sportsmanship.
* Be knowledgeable and practice all rules and regulations. Make sure that both players and parents are aware of them also.
* Remember that it is a kids game!

Teamwork

One of the most important factors that kids learn through team sports is TEAMWORK. There is no "I" in TEAM. Teamwork teaches kids to work together to reach a goal or achievement. When practicing teamwork kids will learn to trust and have faith in their team mates. It gives each individual child their own role and a chance to be recognized and appreciated by the others. Other key factors taught by teamwork are being unselfish and patients. In order to practice good teamwork you must learn to give and take responsibility and give others a chance to learn and grow.
Learning to work together as team will also help children with their developmental skills in school and other social environments. As children grow and venture through life teamwork will play an important roll in many other aspects of life. It is important for children to learn teamwork at a young age to ensure that they get a good grip on the advantages and importance of working with others as a team.